School's back, and with it come a range of new relationships and situations for youngsters to negotiate.

Perfectly timed, then, is a new book release from Melbourne-based scientist and 'edutainer' Dr Matt Agnew which offers advice for developing cool, calm and rational thinking.

'The Kids' Guide to Speaking Your Mind Without Losing Your Cool' deals with queries such as: 'When I read, see or hear something, how do I know if it's true or false?'; 'What if I'm right and my friend's wrong - how do we stay friends?'; and 'Is it okay to change my mind?'.

Dr Matt explains how to avoid confirmation bias and 'us vs them' thinking, and how to stay calm and show respect to others in the heat of an argument, along with tips on how to debate like a pro.

There are also some thought experiments to try at home or in the classroom to sharpen kids' thinking and debating skills.

"We can't hope to solve problems if we can't even discuss and debate them, and so it's critically important to not just be able to figure out what is true and what is false, but that we can present our argument in a way that is actually being heard," Dr Matt said.

"This requires mutual respect and healthy debate, and that skill is often lost.

"This book hopes to help people understand how to argue in a way to actually find peaceful and amicable resolutions."

Importantly, the final section of the book deals with how to care for yourself and others when arguing, including regulating emotions, and helping friends who haven't yet developed critical thinking and evidence-gathering skills.

"It's actually good to have arguments because you, and whoever you’re arguing with, can both learn something," Dr Matt says in the book's conclusion.

"But it's important these arguments are healthy, respectful and positive, and that is what's sometimes difficult.

"At the end of the day, we don't want to lose friends or loved ones because of an argument that spiralled out of control.

"Preserving our relationships with friends and family is the most important aspect of our lives, so while arguing is always going to happen, we want to make sure we can have an argument in a healthy way that allows us to maintain good relationships even when we disagree."

* The Wangaratta Chronicle has a copy of 'The Kids' Guide to Speaking Your Mind Without Losing Your Cool' (RRP $26.99) to give away to one lucky reader, thanks to publisher Allen & Unwin. If you would like that to be you, email skerwin@nemedia.com.au and tell us why you'd like to own the book.